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Oh, that wonderful, soaring feeling when you finally become a real girlfriend. You feel so happy to be close to someone, to hug her, to kiss her, and by and large just exist around that special someone. Sadly, maintaining a human relationship requires more than just being nowadays. The two partners must maintain the excitement, passion, and energy as time passes. Larn how to keep a new daughter or an old flame interested in you over the long haul.

  1. 1

    Exist genuine. Being yourself in your relationship is 1 of the biggest steps you can accept to maintaining your girlfriend'due south involvement and being satisfied in the relationship. If yous are constantly having to adjust who you are to please your partner you will have trouble developing intimacy with this private. Knowing that you tin be true to yourself and however be accepted is important in sustaining your happiness and your girlfriend'southward long-term.[one]

    • Don't mistake being authentic and genuine to being resistant to change. Everyone has some traits in which they tin improve, and relationships can be a bang-up vehicle for us to ameliorate ourselves. If y'all do change, just exist mindful that y'all are sticking to your life values and priorities.

  2. 2

    Spend quality time with her. In the early stages of a relationship, keeping involvement revolves around developing a potent bail. Making an try to spend fourth dimension together alone allows you to forge a connection with your girlfriend. Time together doesn't have to involve pricey dates. This shared time tin be whatever activity that the both of you lot similar and that enables you to enjoy one another, such as hiking, working out, or trying a new trip the light fantastic class.[2]

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  3. three

    Touch her frequently. Starting at infancy, touch becomes one of our most basic needs and first forms of language. We are comforted, soothed, and excited by the touch of another.

    • Concrete intimacy of any kind is vital to the health of a relationship. Notwithstanding, non-sexual touching, such as cuddling, hugging, or rubbing her back tin induce a positive mood in your partner and strengthen your bond.[3]

  4. 4

    Larn her likes and dislikes. Knowing what your girlfriend is passionate virtually can deepen your bond.[4] Talk to her most her hobbies and interests. However, it's also important to know her dislikes, so that you tin avoid doing things or discussing topics that brand her uncomfortable. Ironically, acting interested in her can assist her to maintain interest in you.

    EXPERT TIP

    Elvina Lui is a Licensed Wedlock and Family Therapist specializing in relationship counseling based in the San Francisco Bay Surface area. Elvina received her Masters in Counseling from Western Seminary in 2007 and trained nether the Asian Family Institute in San Francisco and the New Life Community Services in Santa Cruz. She has over thirteen years of counseling experience and is trained in the harm reduction model.

    Elvina Lui, MFT

    Elvina Lui, MFT
    Relationship Practiced

    How do you continue somebody interested? According to Elvina Lui, couples counselor and therapist, "You must become so close and and then valuable that you are irreplaceable. If you build that, you won't e'er have to worry if you lot are loved and wanted, because both of you volition feel constantly loved and wanted."

  5. 5

    Laugh together. Laughter has a long list of benefits for concrete and mental health. Enquiry likewise shows that the social benefits of laughter tin can strengthen your relationships, help defuse conflict, and attract others to you.[5] To maintain the involvement of your girlfriend, make her laugh by playing games, watching funny movies or YouTube videos, or just doing silly things together.

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  1. 1

    Do self-disclosure. Vulnerability feels scary, only it actually links us to others in a positive style. A bully way to be vulnerable with your girlfriend is to share your personal thoughts, ideas, values, goals or secrets. This improves the intimacy you share with your girlfriend and tin provide you with a sense of support.

    • Carefully judge between high-level and depression-level self-disclosures until y'all feel more than comfortable sharing. For example, you may not be quite ready to share the details about your parents' divorce, but you may want to tell your girlfriend virtually your career aspirations or featherbrained behavior yous had as a child.

  2. ii

    Listen. Having a lack of communication is one of the chief reasons a human relationship fails.[half-dozen] Sharing with your girlfriend is important, but so is allowing her to share. Effective communication with your girlfriend begins with being an effective listener. During a conversation, endeavor to use the LARA method:[seven]

    • Listen by attuning to her body language, tone, and words. Receive what she is proverb without striving to reply. Listen without judgment. Your whole goal should be to empathise how she feels and the bulletin she is trying to convey.
    • Affirm or acknowledge her message. Show that you lot have heard what she says by responding with "I understand" or "I come across what you lot are trying to say."
    • Answer by asking a clarifying question or summarizing what you think your girlfriend said.
    • Add your ain thoughts and feelings in a constructive manner. Utilise "I" statements, such as "I am happy that y'all tin talk to me about things like this. I hope nosotros continue to communicate with each other in the futurity".

  3. 3

    Tell the truth. Honesty is an integral aspect of all relationships. If your girlfriend mistrusts you or doubts the sincerity of your words or actions, she may begin to lose interest in the relationship. What's more, even if y'all stay together the dynamic of the relationship is damaged past lies. Strive to be honest in your communications with your girlfriend (even if you worry it will hurt her or she will not be receptive) since lies build upwards walls rather than tear them down.[8]

  4. 4

    Lift her mood when she is sad. When your partner is sad, you might try annihilation and everything to "fix" her. Of course, you want her to be upbeat and normal. Women, yet, desire to feel supported and understood. Instead of trying to fix your girlfriend, work on comforting her. This will help her to feel more continued to you lot. Ways to comfort a distressing girlfriend include:[9]

    • Enquire her what you can practise to aid.
    • Talk to her near what's going right or positive parts of her day.
    • Do uplifting and positive things together
    • Tell her you lot care virtually her.
    • Give her space and fourth dimension alone when she needs information technology.

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  1. one

    Engage in open communication. Being receptive to feedback about the relationship, and existence willing to provide your ain can really make a deviation in a healthy and lasting human relationship. Tips for maintaining positive interactions include the post-obit: [10]

    • Stick to the 48-hour rule. If one of you is nevertheless angry about a state of affairs afterwards 48 hours, talk about it. If not, let it go.
    • Be wary of body language. Crossed arms or legs bespeak anger or defensiveness. Face your partner with an cock posture and open artillery and legs. Unclench your hands.
    • Refrain from attacking. Take a moment to think and carefully select your words before speaking. Strive to use "I" statements that minimize your partner becoming defensive.

  2. 2

    Let her come across your family unit as your connection deepens. After the courting has endured for a length of time, you should show your girlfriend you are serious and committed to the relationship past bringing her home to come across your family. Failing to introduce her to your parents afterwards besides long sends her the bulletin that you don't see this partnership going anywhere. Keep her interested by further opening upwards to her and letting her come across the other important people in your life.

    • Since your girlfriend and your parents will interpret this as a meaningful move that symbolizes your commitment to the relationship, you should simply have your girlfriend home if y'all are truly serious nigh her.[11]

  3. three

    Maintain separate interests across the relationship. Beingness in a healthy, happy human relationship means that both partners have the opportunity to enjoy life together and separately. Ensure that both you and your girlfriend have friendships, interests, and hobbies apart also as together.[12]

  4. iv

    Back up her. Your girlfriend volition likely experience many ups and downs during the grade of your relationship. Feelings like she has yous equally a source of support can strengthen your bail and actually make her want to reciprocate being supportive to y'all. Supporting your girlfriend ways creating a safe place for her to feel at abode with being herself, sharing with you and even making mistakes. [13]

    • Being supportive might include standing by your girlfriend during tough times, challenging her to do and be her best, giving her the space to explore her identity and grow, and never judging or placing constraints on her.

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